An Unexpected Surprise

So now we get to another reason for the January hiatus. I have been tired. Tired beyond recognition. Too tired to move. And sick. Not "vomiting" sick, but nauseous morning noon and night. On top of that, I have that class I'm teaching. And my "real job" and "real life." So blogging very much at all just seems to be out of the question. Here at the end of January I hate to tell those of you who would like me to go back to regular posts, that February looms to be more of the same.

The reason for the fatigue and the nauseousness, it turns out, is a baby. I am pregnant. Unexpectedly, surprisingly with child.

Baby's first photo - 8 weeks.
Head is down and right.

We weren't trying to get pregnant, per se. Mainly because we didn't think it was remotely possible, I guess. You see, we did try, years ago, to get pregnant. We were tested for abnormalities and none were found. We tried infertility treatments and none ever worked. So at the end of the day we gave up. And, while it's easy to write this now, in one little sentence, we moved on from that. Not overnight. Not without sadness and grieving over something we thought we wanted. But we did. We made peace with it. We really did. We moved on. And I am here to tell you I was really happy with our life and felt blessed.

Second photos - 12 weeks.
Head is on the left, legs and feet on right.

So, not to get too graphic for my male readers, when I was "late" last December, I thought nothing of it. I was DIETING, people. I was doing really well with that diet, too. And I was very, very busy at work with holiday programming. And I had certainly been late before. No biggie.

But after two weeks of being late (that part really not being that unusual) and just being sick of feeling like I had constant PMS, I decided to take a pregnancy test. The directions say to pee on the stick and then wait a number of minutes to see the results. Sister, I was so pregnant by this point it had turned positive before I could even get it out of the stream of pee. I walked out of the bathroom and told S, "I'm pregnant." He said, "Nuh-uh..." I said, "Yeah, I think so." Then I took him the test and the instructions for a second opinion. He agreed - it appeared I was pregnant.

Whoa. Geez. Really? Man. That's a lot to process.

I should say, before he shoots me, that S was pretty much excited from the get go. I am the one - the tired, nauseous one - that has had to process it a few days longer. I mean, as I said before, we processed the information about not having children over time. It wasn't like I could flip a switch back immediately! It just wasn't going to happen.

A week after the big positive test, I had a great deal of cramping and I was convinced I was miscarrying. I told S something was not right. He said I should call the doctor on call, who sent me to the hospital to get a sonogram and some blood work, since she had not seen me yet, ostensibly to rule out an ectopic pregnancy. Blood tests and sonograms later, all was well, except that I had a nasty kidney infection. They gave me a shot in the butt and some oral antibiotics and sent me home to lie in bed for a few days. We actually saw the embryo on the screen that day too, but didn't get a copy of it. At that point, it looked sort of like a seahorse.

So we decided we should wait to tell people until 12 weeks had passed. To make sure the biggest chance of miscarriage was over. And that passed this last week. So I told my boss, who, God bless him, was just very excited for me. And we told family, friends, co-workers, random acquaintances, over the last couple of days. And now I'm blogging about it.

And, before you already turn me into child protective services, I am excited about it. I am no longer feeling an affinity for the "unplanned pregnancy?" billboard on the way to work, which was really speaking to me a few weeks ago. I am getting around to being over the overwhelmed part. OK, scratch that. I am not sure I will ever be over being overwhelmed for the rest of my life. And I am not as tired as I was, thank God. But I'm still nauseous. I'm looking forward to that ending too - people keep telling me it will. So, I have hope they are more knowledgeable than I am on this topic. Generally, I'm sure I'm just being a normal pregnant person.

The excitement quotient doubled-tripled-quadrupled when I saw the sonogram during week twelve. I wasn't supposed to have one that day, actually. Just a heartbeat check. But, while she could hear the fetus moving around (bloop-bloop noises on the heart monitor) she couldn't get a lock on the heartbeat. So, they sent me in for a sonogram. As you can see above, the eight week sonogram looked a lot like a kidney bean with a heartbeat. But this time - the twelve week sonogram - it looked pretty much like a BABY. And the heartbeat was there right away. And that little thing was waving its hand around and kicking its legs, turning its head. That was so cool. Amazing, really. Totally amazing. It made it seem so much more real. And maybe a tad worth all this bother.

We are going to find out if it is a boy or a girl. But we are not doing any other genetic testing, even though I am of "advanced maternal age," a horrible phrase. We are just going to take it from here and see what we end up with! I would put my money on a girl, if I were betting. The heartbeat has been high - 165 - which generally means it's a girl. The Chinese birth calendar, which is certainly 50% right, says its a girl. We weren't trying, which, again without going into information the menfolk would rather skip, usually means it's a girl. And that would be fine. I can list pros and cons of either sex. And I'll be happy with either. The sonogram that can help determine the sex will be on March 10th. So stay tuned.

We're trying to decide if we want to move before this blessed event. Our house only has two bedrooms, which means we'll lose our guest room/office if we stay. Again, there are pros and cons of both. We could certainly stay in the house until next spring and sell then. Then we'd know more about our finances post-baby. And we'd have a better idea of what our priorities will be post-baby. And certainly we could manage without a guest room for a year. The rest of the house is quite spacious for two people and a baby. But, the equity we have in this house would help us pay off some debt and get into something with three bedrooms. There is that home buyer tax credit that could disappear next year. And interest rates are certain to rise before next year too. Our house, though, needs some TLC before listing it, and we aren't going to purchase one before selling the other one. We did that once. We're not going to repeat it. And...I don't want to be moving in my third trimester. So who knows...we'll see how far we get in the next month and take it from there.

There are lots of other things to take under consideration - childcare for one. Apparently, in the city, childcare is costly and not abundant. Waiting lists abound. I do intend to go back to work after taking 12 weeks off, however, so reliable childcare will be essential. I'll be spending a great deal of time researching options in the coming weeks and months. And, back to the "should we move" question - now we have to think about schools when we move. Not tomorrow, but one day this child will need to enroll in school. These, my friends, are things I never thought I'd be pondering. But I am now, sister. I am now!

And, coincidentally, both - not one, but BOTH - of my Texas sisters-in-law are pregnant too. Yep - a whole lot of babies by Christmas. One about 11 weeks before ours, one about 5 weeks after ours. Lots of babies. Everywhere. Goodness.

Oh, and I'm due August 8th. In the heat of the Texas summer. Yeah. I know. I know. Please, if you see me in July, be kind to me and my cankles. I told the ladies at work that I planned to buy a big pink MuMu and wear it every single blessed day. And sit at my desk with a fan underneath me. God bless. I hate the Texas summer anyway. God bless. God bless.

So there you have it. An unexpected surprise that's really - literally - growing on me. The diet is on hiatus, too, I guess. But I am proud to say I didn't gain anything during the first trimester. And all those loose pants are now coming in really handy to put off the maternity clothes shopping for just a little longer. So we have a lot to take in, a lot to do, a lot to learn, a lot of change. A new adventure.

And I'll blog when I can. See you soon.

A Fun Night for John

You know S's friend John and his wife Jennifer, not to mention his cute little boy Jack, and his mom and aunt that we saw at the Pioneer Woman's book signing...

...well, John, as I've mentioned here and there, is having a time of it recently. Those fabulous lungs he received just a little over two years ago are now being rejected by his body. He's been in and out of the hospital with the complications from this. Not to mention this treatment and that, all trying to stop the rejection. He's back on the transplant list, hoping to get another set of life saving lungs, and trying to stay well enough to endure the surgery that comes with a transplant like that.

Jennifer and Jack at the party.

And Jennifer and Jack have to be emotionally spent too. And his parents. And scores of other friends and relatives. It's exhausting wishing the best for your loved one. Of course, it's the only thing to do - the thing you want to be there to do - but it is draining - taxing - a long haul for everyone involved. Not to mention John is the kind of person who, lying in that bed, I am certain, is on some level worrying about what he can do for all of them. It's a trying, tiring situation where everyone is hoping - waiting - praying - for the best. And feeling the good wishes of friends around them. And the good work of prayer. Nonetheless...it has to be, well, not what any of them would like to be doing.

Saturday night, one of John's friends organized a fundraiser to benefit John and his family. The funds collected from a cover charge for each participant and from a silent auction of hundreds of donated items all went to John's family to help defray the costs of medical care, living expenses while John is away from work, and the general needs of his family. You would not believe the outpouring of his friends and family and the outpouring of total strangers for this auction. There were hundreds - HUNDREDS - of auction items at all price levels. From baseballs to high end vacations and everything in between.

In fact, I went to the salon Saturday to get a little update. While I was there, my stylist and friend Michelle, who happens to be the best stylist in the world in case you were wondering, asked me what we were doing Saturday night. So, I told her we were going to this benefit. She up and donated a haircut/blow dry/style from her to the event. Can you believe that? I thought it was incredibly nice of her. And it brought in some money for John's family. So it was great.

Anyway, the event was held at this very chic bar called the AM/PM Lounge. I am here to tell you one thing I quite know for sure about that place - that I am certainly not cool enough to be part of their regular clientele. Not even close. The event was from 6-8pm, long before the regulars would be coming out to party on a Saturday night. You know, after I'm in bed, comfortably sleeping in my jammies. And I meant to take my good camera to the event, but in the hustle and bustle of the day I totally forgot. So I had the trusty purse camera and you have some grainy, slightly blurry photos to check out of the festivities.

S, Cheryl and Sam

S's brother Michael and his wife Brooke went along as well as S's parents Sam and Cheryl. S and John have been friends since they were in the 2nd grade, so the whole family knows John and wanted to pitch in.

The bidding floor.

We all had a fun time bidding on some items of interest. And we all won something we were bidding on. S won some very nice Nocona boots. I tried to win the one female pair but the bidding got too rich for me. I won some hair products that I use regularly. S's dad won a retro looking radio that he really had his eye on. Brooke and Michael won a portrait session from an acclaimed local portrait photographer. So, it was a good night for us too, I'd say!

A photo of the big, main bar.


The kitchen, just behind the bidding area.


A close up of some auction items.


I thought this ceiling of disco balls was cool.


A cool chair on the way to the restroom.


The restrooms.

Yes, that's right. The restrooms were cutting edge too. They were very "open." Don't get me wrong, the commodes were individually behind those and other doors out of the frame, but you could see right into the men's and women's sides of the space, with that column there separating the area. If you were a woman washing your hands at the sink or checking your hair, any man doing the same could see you and vice versa. Clearly, again, I was totally not cool enough for this place. And I am totally comfortable with my un-coolness.

But, what was definitely way cool - cooler than this place and all the people in it - was the collective way everyone came together for John and his family. That part was way, way cool. And, of course, we are keeping John in our prayers, wishing and hoping the very best outcome of this current situation, and many, many more future, happy reasons to party.

A Portrait Attempt

Faleena, Caitlin, Mark

Over the holiday break I had the pleasure of photographing my friends Faleena and Mark with their newest addition, baby Caitlin. They were hoping to get a family photo out of the time spent with my camera, and I think we were able to get a couple of decent shots.

Some glare issues here with Mark's glasses here, but it's so good of Mama and baby I left it in.

We had some limitations to the photo shoot - we tried earlier in the week, but Caitlin was coming down with a serious ear infection and was not her usual lovely self, as you can imagine. And the weather, you might remember, was unseasonably cold for Dallas for most of the month of December and the start of 2010. Thank goodness this week we've gotten back to some unseasonably WARM temperatures!

Even when Caitlin was feeling better a few days later, she was sort of sober for the shoot. I got a couple with a little smile, but mostly caught genuine sober baby faces, which are cute enough for anyone. And, this photographer isn't as adept at capturing photos of little ones this age...once they start toddling around, I'm a little better. A little.

This post showcases a couple of the shots I felt were the most interesting. I hope you enjoy them.

We took the inside shots at Mark's parents' house.


I think there is no debating who's running the show here.


She's clearly looking at Mommy here.


Speaking of Mommy, here's an attempt at a mother-daughter pose.


I love this one.


And how about a few of the big C by herself.




And I think this one clearly shows Caitlin's thoughts on the photographer.



The frog turned out to be a good prop.




She's a cute one, no?

Last but not least, we attempted a group shot with the grandparents and the dog. This was almost too much for this photographer. Her skills are of the AMATEUR variety. But, with help from Photoshop, we got the following composite...

I think it looks like they are watching me worrying about the outcome of the shot and wondering that themselves, but if you didn't know the circumstance, they are all looking towards the camera, except the baby, who is looking in the general direction anyway, and have pleasant looks on their faces. So, it wasn't a total washout I suppose!

So there you have it. Some photos of my friends from LA LA Land. Thank you, Faleena and Mark for letting me attempt a family photo for you. I hope you enjoy them!

Since I haven't posted recently, I'll give you a little update on stuff around here. Let me tell you the class is off to a good start. It's a lot of work for me and them, I suppose, but so far so good. And the diet isn't in full throttle yet after the holiday hiatus I must confess, but the good news is I haven't gained any weight since the last official weigh in before the holidays. And that's something! Besides working feverishly at work and on the class, S and I have started working on the little things on the house we have never finished - trim, paint, etc in an attempt to finish things up and have the pleasure of living in a "finished" house. (Does that ever happen?) I have also started taking a look at those closets of mine and I'm making a plan for a late winter purge. We have too much STUFF, people. Too much. God bless us.

Best wishes for the rest of your week and for whatever it is you have on tap for the weekend. See you soon.

Losing a Loyal Companion

Over the weekend our friends Cathy and Thomas lost their first baby, Dawson, a chocolate lab, to bone cancer. He was thirteen. He had a pretty long life, considering his health, for a dog. And he was certainly one of the "good ones" - a very good dog.

He was an integral part of their family and I know he is greatly missed today and for years to come. Dogs - pets, animals - they become such a part of our family, don't they? And they reward us for this inclusion with unconditional love. It is so hard to lose them when they go.

Of course, Dawson's death has me thinking of my own aging pet population here at home. Ellie is ten and Echo is nine. They are not going to live forever. If we're lucky, we have five or six more hopefully healthy years with them by our sides. And then there's Norman, who at twelve, still thinks he's middle aged, showing no signs of slowing down whatsoever.

But our girls, they already show signs of age. They take medicine. They sleep a lot more. They don't want to walk quite as far. I don't know why God chose to give us such wonderful companions who cannot be with us for any longer than they are, but this is a fact of life that we pet lovers have to make part of our reality.

I think it is because we don't really appreciate all that love coming our way. Maybe it's so we do appreciate them more. In fact, I think it's the reason some choose to not have pets - to not go through the grief of losing them. But, I believe the love and companionship they give is worth the grief tenfold.

There are many people who say animals don't go to heaven when they die - that they don't have souls. I am not a learned philosopher or sage in any way, but I disagree with this point of view for two reasons. First, I disagree they have no souls. Anyone who has loved and known a dog in their life knows these animals have old, deep souls that surpass our silly little consciousness in so many ways. Second, I believe if heaven is to be paradise that my dogs will be there with me. No paradise would be complete without them.

I send hugs to Cathy and Thomas and their children as they grieve the loss of their loyal friend. And I'll hug my girls a little tighter and a little longer as I try to capture every moment I can with them at my side.

Best wishes for your week.

Texas Christmas

When we made it back to Texas after Christmas, we gathered together with S's side of the family to celebrate the holiday (and his birthday) a little late.

It was mostly about kids opening presents.


This was an unusual gift for Alexandra.

I wish I had a "before" photo. In fact, I thought I HAD a "before" photo. I looked everywhere for it, and it's nowhere to be found, so I guess I don't have one. It is unusual in that we aren't usually the artsy crafty types. We're usually the "cash in hand" type of aunt or uncle. So, this was indeed exceptional prior planning on our part.

Anyway, I picked up that babydoll crib, completely in disrepair, at the same rummage sale where I purchased the little stool that I refurbished. I decided it had potential and the niece closest to the appropriate age for all that potential was probably Alexandra. S sanded down the structure, filled the nail holes, smoothed and repaired the wood. I created a mattress and cover, pillow and baby blanket. I even made a blankie for Alexandra so she and her babydoll would have a matching pair.

I think it turned out pretty well. If you could see the "before" photos you would think so too. Alexandra received a babydoll from Santa that will be perfect for the new babydoll crib. (not pictured here) But, when she opened it, she decided SHE was the perfect size for the babydoll crib. Not exactly the plan, but you know, go with the flow.

Since I was sewing, and Andrew likes to cuddle with soft things, I made this "boy" blankie for him. Of course, he really was more into the wrapping paper than the presents at his age.

The parents opened some gifts too.



Then we were entertained by the munchkins.



That's pretty much how it goes when they are around.
And they are pretty entertaining.

So look at that - even on hiatus, I've managed to recap Christmas before the end of January. I am feverishly preparing for my first class, which happens to be on Thursday. Wish me luck. I'm gonna need it.

Happy Tuesday! See you soon.

Hoosier Christmas

Before 2010 is half over, I figure I should post about the fun we had in Indiana for Christmas. We did all the things we usually do when we go to Indiana - visited family, mainly. We just did them again this year. Another year gone by, new stories to tell. Kids are different ages, into different things. You know, general family stuff!

Cora, reading to Deacon and S.

In that photo up there, S is wearing his "Hawaii Bowl" shirt, which we went out to a special store to purchase before leaving Dallas and he donned on Christmas Eve, you know, for the big game. And SMU won. In case you didn't know it. SMU went to a bowl game. Played on national television. And won. Amazing. A Christmas miracle!

Grandpa and Veda

In that photo, Veda is wearing her pair of pajamas that my mother made. She also made a matching pair for her American Girl doll. They are pink with soccer balls all over. Very, very Veda. Veda is also holding in her hot little hand one of the electronic games that engulfed the kids this Christmas. They do keep them quiet and occupied, but it's a little strange HOW occupied...

On Christmas night, we all gathered to celebrate S's birthday.

We had spaghetti. Of course. And chocolate cake with cream cheese icing. And there was singing involved. And ice cream. It was a regular birthday extravaganza.

We gathered together with all my brothers and their families at dad's house.

And that little on on the left - that's my great-nephew Rolen - he's growing like only a kid can, I guess. So big! And of course, on the right is Ryon, also growing a lightning speed. In the background is my brother Rick, Ryon's dad.

Dad got a leaf blower from the kids.
I'm pretty sure the packaging didn't "blow" the surprise.

This is one of Veda WITHOUT the silly face.
It's because S took it. She likes him better.


Not the greatest photo, but check out Ryon's ensemble...
...cowboy boots go with EVERYTHING!


We took a few family photos - this one I thought was exceptionally good!


We went to feed the less fortunate again this year with my mom's extended side of the family.


The kids set things out in the serving area and helped serve.



Unk and Lori were in charge of the french toast sticks.




S washed dishes.
In his baggy jeans. We did get him some new pants that fit over the break.
Four inches smaller in the waist...can you believe that!


Steve and I spent some time playing guitar.
We really enjoyed it, even though you can't tell in this photo.


A fun time was had by all.


Yes, the gloves DO help you play the game.


We had a wonderful trip.








Another wonderful holiday to remember.

Best wishes for your Thursday. See you soon!

Hiatus

Last year, January was a tough month for me on the blog. Not much was going on and it was hard to come up with a post every day.

This January, I am going to be busy, but not with blog-interesting stuff. I'll be teaching a class at SMU for one, and will be busy at my "real job" as well. But we, generally speaking, don't have a lot of activities planned for the month that will be blog-worthy.

So, I am going to try a little bit of a hiatus for the month of January. I will post from time to time when I have something to say - and you know I will have something to say - but I am not going to post every day this month. At the end of the month, I will evaluate this little experiment and move forward.

I have some posts I still need to get up from the holidays. I have some posts about food. I have some posts I haven't even dreamed up yet. Just not everyday posts. That's the only change.

The good news is, if you subscribe to or follow this blog and other blogs you read, you just have to sign in to see if any of your blogs have posted and go there directly. If you don't subscribe, I hope you'll check back from time to time to see what is new. And I hope you won't hate me for this little change this month. If you don't hate me, I won't hate you. Deal? Deal. Good. Glad we have that settled.

So there you have it. I'm going on a little hiatus for the start of 2010.

Happy January. See you later.